As we finally start to warm up to the summer (thank god!) the time is finally upon us to start working on my tan (yes black people tan to you know!). Speaking of which, when I was in my local chemist looking to purchase some sun tan lotion I was casually checking out the factor 30+ and the assistant who I suppose was trying to "ässist" me asks me "Is this for you sir?!?"....now I could easily have taken this two ways...maybe even three but seeing as I was in a funny sort of mood I replied "yes I need it to top up my white bits".....the look on her face was priceless....hahaha!!!
So this week I said goodbye to my work colleagues and friends at Fit N Fast who went out of their way to sign a shirt for me as a memento of the memories that we had whilst working there....(where's a tissue when you need one!)...Good luck to you all!
On to church and this week I spent most of the service listening to a chinese man who I shall now avoid from every Sunday at all costs (sorry "Tone Death Tony") as he simply destroyed all musical notes known to mankind. Now I ain't no Luther Vandross but I know what sounds good from bad but folks this was awful. I'm sure you've heard of the term "voice like a strangled cat" well this was more "voice like constipated lion"....goodbye eardrums!!!!
Now as if I wasn't going to brag about my little 15 minutes of rapping fame from Friday night as I shared a memorable and somewhat messy night (ain't that right Patrick!) on Friday as myself and the tagroom team went out to "let our hair down". Being the black guy that I am I ended up coming out late so I had to catch up with the antics of the night and catch I did as I was led to some under ground karoake room club that we turned in to 106 and Park, although if I was to show you the video footage from the night you would think I was more biggie falls than biggie smalls...ah well....at least we had fun!!!
Saturday night saw the reunion of the former Nomads crew as I FINALLY got my invite round to see the girls new pad for their official housewarming....nice work ladies. After all going our seperate ways I ended up popping into cheers bars to watch the mighty toon destroy spurs 2-1 (cue hating yids fans haha!)
Back to work where I was given another compliment, this time by a woman that was only old enough to be mum this week (the age gap is getting smaller!) as she expressed her desire to me let me know that I should be on a TV advert looking all sharp (no lies!).....obviously from that moment on I was on high and then when I thought things couldn't get any better than this whilst powering a packed crowd of aussies and kiwis during an intense rugby game I hear someone yell "slow down Usain you nearly spilled my pint"....enter back into reality!
Come Monday morning the streets of Sydney were packed and buzzing as the Australian olympic team were being paraded around with their medals in tow. Typically I had the most entertaining seat in the house as I was stood next to a drunken hobo who was carrying a box of goon screaming "where's my Sally Pearson?!?"....as if she wants to see your $2 dollar a$$ fool! There's always one! Overall the day was a great turnout and only further inspired me to make sure i'm in Rio by 2016 for the next games....where's my passport?!?
My message this week represents a trait that I'm guilty of but I'vebeen trying to work on for a long time now. Life indeed is too short....especially to hold grudges and as I've made friends and lost them I hope to some day reconcile with people that I was once close with even if its just to say "hi" and "bye" so there's no hard feelings.My advice to anyone who cares to listen is if you have anyone who you've fallen out with, take the time to talk out to sort out your differences before it's too late.
Catch you later
Forde Esq.
No comments:
Post a Comment