So what new exciting stories have I got to tell you...NOTHING. It feels like I've been living under a rock for the past 7 days waiting to get a glimpse of sunlight. I apologise if I don't entertain you with the usual drivel that keeps you amused for next 5 minutes....I just ain't got the time or the energy. Anyways...enough of the bellyaching and back to the story...Soooo....I'm caught between a rock and hard place trying to figure out where life's journey will take me next...after all I got grow up someday?!? With that being said I just hit a major milestone in my Australian checklist department after randomly bumping into a woman called "Sheila". After hearing the term banded around loosely ever since touching down in Oz it was a great pleasure to meet one of the women who's name represents the entire female race.
So to save me write an essay load of I've decided this week to break down the highlights into simple bullet points to make this episode a lot less time consuming for yours and my entertainment.
So Forde's final thought travels along the lines of persistance. After discovering on a nightout on the town that if a group of guys in a bar pesters a girl enough times to "get your tit's out for the lads" she actually might do it then there's no ceiling to what you can achieve...after all as the saying goes..."You don't ask you don't get"....I'll leave it at that shall I?!?
So to save me write an essay load of I've decided this week to break down the highlights into simple bullet points to make this episode a lot less time consuming for yours and my entertainment.
- Bedtime made easy - My new bed has finally arrived courtesy of my new housemates retrieval efforts. After months of sleeping on a blow up mattress...no more will wake up in the morning in an "L" shaped position with a foot pump as a pillow.
- Melbourne Cup - So apparently this is the race that stops a nation....literally!!! People down in Melbourne take the day off and spend millions of dollars to bet on one race whilst getting absolutely plastered and making a complete tit of themselves...sounds familiar?!? **Cough Cough**...Grand National
- November has arrived or shall I say "Movember" has arrived and already I'm getting mocked for the lack of hair that's suppose to keep my upper lip warm. In my defence I've never been much of werewolf when it comes to facial hair so the best I have to offer is the few strands of bumfluff that hangs off the end of my chin for dear life for the next 30 days
- Whilst at work I took another dive into the world of women's monthly cycle. Whilst innocently sitting my my lunch break, co women workers decided to discuss their time of month in a great attempt make my food re appear in an unexpected fashion....where's the emergency exit when you need it?!?
- Praise The Forde?!? So after a week of sin as I always I decide to "cleanse my soul" and head on to church but this time I managed to get roped into a pray group full of people begging for real life issues in their life i.e. Sickness, Visa approval, Help with marriage....I'm sure you don't need a polaroid to get the picture! So who do they ask to lead the circle in pray....yeah me...what do I know....so I give me best "freestyle" to the man upstairs about helping these guys next to me and by the end of it these people are loving me and rejoicing as if I healed the world....Praise the who now....PRAISE THE FORDE!!!
So Forde's final thought travels along the lines of persistance. After discovering on a nightout on the town that if a group of guys in a bar pesters a girl enough times to "get your tit's out for the lads" she actually might do it then there's no ceiling to what you can achieve...after all as the saying goes..."You don't ask you don't get"....I'll leave it at that shall I?!?
Until next time people....take care and take control of your life before something or someone else does!!!
Forde Esq.
